Setback

When I was little I was taught, and still believe, that God answers questions in 3 ways.  "Yes", "No", and "Not Right Now".  Clearly the first is the one we desire most, the one we would have be the answer to all our requests, wants, and needs.  The other two are not as pleasant to hear, mainly because they rarely are in line with what we feel/see/believe/want to happen.  I'm not sure which is worse, the "No" or the "Not Right Now".  With "No" there is disappointment, but at least there is also finality.  With "Not Right Now" there isn't finality, but at least hope for the much-wanted "Yes" is still alive.  So I guess it depends on the person, the situation, or the request.

Why do I bring this up you ask?  Well today we got a healthy dose of the above pondering here in Drosche Land.  See, you know we officially submitted our LOI last Monday.  We are smack dab in the middle of the 2-4 week waiting period for our PA (Pre Approval) and anxiously waiting the word.  So, today Amy received a phone call from our agency.  It ended up being about the status of our LOI, but a far cry from the phone call we were hoping for.  Turns out it wasn't good news at all, and at first it seemed quite the opposite.  See, Great Wall (our awesome agency) very rarely deals with anyone as young as we are attempting to adopt from China.  So I guess, we're special.  Well, specialness aside, the CCAA (China Center of Adoption Affairs) initially declined our LOI because of this.  However, we are blessed to have such a wonderful agency and people working on our behalf.  Our agent was in talks with them over several days, informing them that Amy's birthday was in August, only 6 months away and that we had done our research and were serious and sincere about adopting Margaux.  It also came out that we were the first ones to proceed further with her file, no one had gone any further than simply looking.  This information breaks my heart, but at the same time encourages me.  It makes me sad that no one had gone further, but makes me glad because since they hadn't we could.  It gives me hope and strengthens my belief that she is in fact our daughter.

Well, after the discussions with our agency, the CCAA finally agreed to allow our file and Margaux's file to wait together.  We however, can move no further until Amy's birthday.  Who'd have thought that 30 would look so good?  We can continue with our home study, the immigration paperwork, and everything else; but nothing can be submitted.  On Amy's birthday our LOI can officially be re-submitted.  We will then have to wait the 2-4 weeks again before receiving our PA.  Upon that we can officially submit our dossier and then more waiting.  So, basically what happens is that everything is pushed back.  How long?  Good question.  It could be a month or slightly less, it could be 4-6 months longer than we have expected.  There is no way to know now.  Another hard part is that we will not be able to share her or any information about her until the fall.  We will also not be able to send her packages until then either.  

So, "Not Right Now" seems to be His answer for us right now.  It's neither good, nor bad.  Just wait.  More waiting.  You'd think we would be used to it by now, even in our relatively short experience with the process, but no.  I don't think we ever will be and I don't think the waiting will ever be any easier.  Amy and I are handling the news differently.  We are worried.  This means she has longer to wait.  Longer without the love, care, and support we so want to give her.  That is hard.  We have though found some comforting verses from the Bible.  Romans 8:25 - But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently.  Seems to fit perfectly right?  Also Psalm 46:10 - Be still, and know that I am God.  Also a great comfort.  In fact, all of Psalm 46 is beautiful and quite applicable.  If you haven't read it, I highly recommend it.

Another setback today came with the new building.  They still have yet to receive the Certificate of Occupancy so Amy and the girls were back in the old building today, after the excited preparations of this past weekend.  But they did very well and we are hoping and praying for great news tomorrow.  

So, as you can see it was an all around bummer of a day here in Drosche Land.  Lots of "Not Right Now".  I've handled it pretty well, although I have eaten a fair share of candy to help deal.  We will see how guilty I feel about that tomorrow when it's time to get up and get dressed!  :)  This all just means that there will just be lots of thinking, contemplating, and praying going on in Drosche Land tonight and over the coming days and months.  I also ask for y'all to think and pray for us.  We will gladly take all we can get here.  Prayers for patience, peace, understanding, and hopefulness.  Thanks in advance.

All is well, even though it's "Not Right Now", in Drosche Land.