Prayers

As you may know, if you follow our blog closely, we have somewhat of an adoption guru.  She and her family are amazing and her blog can be found here.  We have been following her blog for quite a while now and, although we don't actually know her, we feel as though we do know her very well.  I've also linked to her site via the button at the top right on our blog.  She is also the one I link to every Sunday via the Sunday Snapshot.  So, it can be surmised that we admire her a lot.  She has some awesome journeys and stories to tell about the children she has adopted from China.  Her faith is also pretty inspirational.  Well, the prayers I'm asking for via this post are for her and her family.

See, they have been on a roller coaster adventure as they work to bring home their next two daughters from China.  All seemed to finally be working out, falling into place.  However, they received some pretty devastating news on Monday.  One of the girls they we in the process of adopting has passed away.  You can read about it here.  Just a few weeks ago they received the LOAs (Letters of Approval) for both girls and were looking forward to travelling to get them in the coming months.  All of that has suddenly changed, their world has been turned upside down.  Their daughter's name was Esther.  She was a Waiting Child with some scary and intimidating heart defects.  That didn't matter to them though.  They saw the beautiful girl God had created, perfect in his image.  Their daughter.  

I can't even wrap my head around this event.  I can't begin to imagine how they must feel or how they will begin to grieve for her.  I know there is a greater plan, His greater plan.  I'm not sure plans in situations like this are ever fully realized by us.  They have been in our thoughts and prayers all along.  This only intensifies now as they mourn their loss.  So, I also ask, if you have a minute to spare, visit her site and/or say a prayer for them.  They are going to need all the prayers they can get in the near, and far, future.

I'll be honest too, this has Amy and I thinking about Margaux.  About the fact that she is waiting.  We are waiting.  Both for each other.  It's scary.  It also brings to mind the many orphans out there, both international and domestic, that are waiting.  Waiting for their forever families.  Waiting for the love they have yet to fully know.  Waiting for the spiritual, emotional, physical, medical, and mental help they need.  All of these children remain in our prayers as well, including our dear little Margaux.  

People still ask, and will probably always ask, us why we chose to adopt.  There is the easy answer about wanting more children but physically not being able to pursue that route.  There is also the answer mentioned in the previous paragraph.  There are so many children out there needing families.  It has been placed upon our hearts to do this.  He has called us to do this.  That is honestly how we feel and is how many people in the same situation feel.  It's both simple to understand, yet difficult to fully explain.  

As I write this my mind wanders to Margaux.  I'm ending my day today here at 9:34 pm CST.  She has already begun her day tomorrow and it's 10:34 am there.  Maybe she's eating a snack.  Maybe she's playing with toys or with friends.  Maybe her caregivers are reading her favorite story.  Maybe she's outside enjoying the partly cloudy 64 degree weather.  The one thing we do have in common is the fact that we are both waiting.  For each other.

So, I close by asking once again for your prayers for the wonderful family I've mentioned in this post.  Prayers also for their other daughter, Poppy (love that name!), who is also waiting for them while they wait for her.  Stop by and check out her blog if you'd like.  She's an incredible writer, photographer, Christian, and person.  


All is well, saddened and praying, here in Drosche Land.

Setback

When I was little I was taught, and still believe, that God answers questions in 3 ways.  "Yes", "No", and "Not Right Now".  Clearly the first is the one we desire most, the one we would have be the answer to all our requests, wants, and needs.  The other two are not as pleasant to hear, mainly because they rarely are in line with what we feel/see/believe/want to happen.  I'm not sure which is worse, the "No" or the "Not Right Now".  With "No" there is disappointment, but at least there is also finality.  With "Not Right Now" there isn't finality, but at least hope for the much-wanted "Yes" is still alive.  So I guess it depends on the person, the situation, or the request.

Why do I bring this up you ask?  Well today we got a healthy dose of the above pondering here in Drosche Land.  See, you know we officially submitted our LOI last Monday.  We are smack dab in the middle of the 2-4 week waiting period for our PA (Pre Approval) and anxiously waiting the word.  So, today Amy received a phone call from our agency.  It ended up being about the status of our LOI, but a far cry from the phone call we were hoping for.  Turns out it wasn't good news at all, and at first it seemed quite the opposite.  See, Great Wall (our awesome agency) very rarely deals with anyone as young as we are attempting to adopt from China.  So I guess, we're special.  Well, specialness aside, the CCAA (China Center of Adoption Affairs) initially declined our LOI because of this.  However, we are blessed to have such a wonderful agency and people working on our behalf.  Our agent was in talks with them over several days, informing them that Amy's birthday was in August, only 6 months away and that we had done our research and were serious and sincere about adopting Margaux.  It also came out that we were the first ones to proceed further with her file, no one had gone any further than simply looking.  This information breaks my heart, but at the same time encourages me.  It makes me sad that no one had gone further, but makes me glad because since they hadn't we could.  It gives me hope and strengthens my belief that she is in fact our daughter.

Well, after the discussions with our agency, the CCAA finally agreed to allow our file and Margaux's file to wait together.  We however, can move no further until Amy's birthday.  Who'd have thought that 30 would look so good?  We can continue with our home study, the immigration paperwork, and everything else; but nothing can be submitted.  On Amy's birthday our LOI can officially be re-submitted.  We will then have to wait the 2-4 weeks again before receiving our PA.  Upon that we can officially submit our dossier and then more waiting.  So, basically what happens is that everything is pushed back.  How long?  Good question.  It could be a month or slightly less, it could be 4-6 months longer than we have expected.  There is no way to know now.  Another hard part is that we will not be able to share her or any information about her until the fall.  We will also not be able to send her packages until then either.  

So, "Not Right Now" seems to be His answer for us right now.  It's neither good, nor bad.  Just wait.  More waiting.  You'd think we would be used to it by now, even in our relatively short experience with the process, but no.  I don't think we ever will be and I don't think the waiting will ever be any easier.  Amy and I are handling the news differently.  We are worried.  This means she has longer to wait.  Longer without the love, care, and support we so want to give her.  That is hard.  We have though found some comforting verses from the Bible.  Romans 8:25 - But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently.  Seems to fit perfectly right?  Also Psalm 46:10 - Be still, and know that I am God.  Also a great comfort.  In fact, all of Psalm 46 is beautiful and quite applicable.  If you haven't read it, I highly recommend it.

Another setback today came with the new building.  They still have yet to receive the Certificate of Occupancy so Amy and the girls were back in the old building today, after the excited preparations of this past weekend.  But they did very well and we are hoping and praying for great news tomorrow.  

So, as you can see it was an all around bummer of a day here in Drosche Land.  Lots of "Not Right Now".  I've handled it pretty well, although I have eaten a fair share of candy to help deal.  We will see how guilty I feel about that tomorrow when it's time to get up and get dressed!  :)  This all just means that there will just be lots of thinking, contemplating, and praying going on in Drosche Land tonight and over the coming days and months.  I also ask for y'all to think and pray for us.  We will gladly take all we can get here.  Prayers for patience, peace, understanding, and hopefulness.  Thanks in advance.

All is well, even though it's "Not Right Now", in Drosche Land. 
 

Home Study

Well, today was a big day for us here in Drosche Land.  Today we met with our social worker to begin our home study for the adoption!  For some reason, both Amy and I were quite nervous all day leading up to our 4:00 p.m. appointment.  Maybe it was the worry that the social worker would say, "These crazies want to adopt?  Are you kidding?"  Maybe we were worried we would make a bad impression.  Maybe we were worried the boys would be out of control.  Maybe we were worried that the social worker would notice, and be unhappy, with the black eye Jack has from running into the wall.  These thoughts, and tons more, swirled around in our heads all day.

Long story short - we had nothing to worry about.  The appointment went very well.  We went through the ridiculously long autobiographies we painstakingly filled out a few weeks ago.  We also just talked with her.  She met the boys and they were reasonably well behaved.  She got to see them for themselves and didn't go running!  All in all it was an easy and pleasant 2 hours.  What now?  I know you're dying to know.  Well, more paperwork!  She gave us a list of all kinds of stuff she needs copies of, think birth certificates and whatnot.  Luckily we (and by we I mean my fabulous wife) have already begun to compile these documents.  We should be able to finish obtaining and organizing all of this by the end of this coming week and can then get it to our social worker.  We also have to begin taking some online training courses, 10 hours worth, which I just signed up for.  We will begin knocking those out here too.  

Luckily for us, since we are waiting for Amy to make the bug 3-0 we have the time to get the home study completed, there is no rush.  So I guess God can work waiting into a blessing huh?  :)  So, we are very happy now and are one step closer to Margaux.  We are still awaiting our pre-approval from China regarding our LOI that was submitted on Monday.  We are about 1 week into the 2-4 week waiting period to hear back.  You know what that means?  More waiting!  :)

All is well, one more hurdle down, in Drosche Land. 

MORE Good News!

Well, here I am again ready to update about all the excitement and joys of the past few days.  So, last I blogged all was well and we were moving forward.  Well, I'm happy to state that it is more of the same.  I'll start with Monday.  Amy called first thing, as was the plan, to "lock" her file.  Well, turns out that since we are slightly over 6 months away from submitting out dossier (on Amy's 30th) we can't actually lock her file.  However, our new best friend at the agency told us that they would ask permission to take her off of the main shared list of children and place her solely on the agency's list, this would essentially be somewhat of a pre-lock situation for us.  We went ahead with that plan and filled out our official application.  As if that weren't good enough news we got some more good news of the financial sort!  It is truly amazing how many things are suddenly just falling into place!

This brings us to today.  We hadn't thought that we would hear anything back about her moving to the agency's list since China is about 14 hours ahead of us.  We figured out this morning that when we are going to school in the morning, she is going to sleep that night.  When we are going home at night, she is waking up the next morning!  So, we were totally expecting to have a few days of waiting.  However, around 1ish this afternoon we heard back from the agency and they did receive permission to move her to their list!  Woo hoo!  We are set!  Needless to say, this made our day!  As happy as I was, it was even more fulfilling to see Amy's response to this latest news!  The look on her face was priceless and one I will remember forever.  

So, what's next?  Well, on Amy's 1/2 birthday we will be 6 months out from submitting our dossier which means that we will be able to officially lock her file and hopefully finish and submit our LOI (Letter of Intent).  More great news, followed by more waiting, such is the cycle of this adoption adventure.  We have been thinking about and discussing what our LOI will be so we will probably get started on that pretty soon.  We are crazy happy, obviously, and are just in such amazed excitement that this is all actually, finally happening!  

To celebrate we do have special plans for this weekend.  We have been mulling over painting her bedroom!  We are in love with the colors that I posted in the Sunday Snapshot post this past weekend!  We will see if that happens this weekend and who knows?  Maybe there will be another Sunday Snapshot of her bedroom!  

All is well, blessed with more great news, in Drosche Land.

The Next Step

So, I know everyone has been waiting with bated breath regarding the great news shared in the last post.  Well, delayed first by frustrations and then my my sickness, here is the update, you can breathe now.

So, you know we have the file of a very special little girl.  The next step, aside from the prayer, consideration, and consultation with our doctor, was the financial planning aspect.  The prayer part went very well, we excelled at it.  The consultation with our doctor went well also, she is fabulous.  We love Dr. Kinalska.  The financial planning, however, did not go as smoothly as we had planned or expected.  Plan A started out strong but came to a screeching halt on Thursday afternoon.  We were really upset, but no worries, onto Plan B.  But it was not going to be that simple.  Plan B came to a similar screeching halt on Friday.  By this time we were in full-on panic mode.  Everything had seemed so perfect, so meant to be.  But now what?  The only thing that brought a little calmness to us was the fact that nothing could be done by anyone over the weekend.  It bought us some time to think and work on Plans C, D, and (if needed) E.  Well, I won't lie to you, we had our share of lows, extreme lows in fact.  But, once again the answer was simply to be found in trust and faith, in God that is.  Again, not something so easy to do, but very necessary in this process.

Saturday morning I woke up sick, really sick.  I only get sick about once a year, and of course it would come at a time like this right?  Well, while I was writhing around in a semi-conscious state in the bed, Amy was at work downstairs, getting a head start on that trust and faith plan I just mentioned.  After some more praying, thinking, and planning she came to realize that we could find the money to begin the process on our own!  The adoption could go on as planned!  By planning, scrimping, and saving we will be able to cover about half of the expenses in cash.  This will get us to August when we officially submit our dossier after Amy's 30th birthday.  This gives us the time to plan, scrimp, and save some more to figure out the rest.  

So, needless to say we are, once again, blissfully ecstatic!  We spent a good portion of today getting her room ready.  Gone is the office/craft room.  Here is the bedroom that awaits our little girl.  We brought down our crib from the attic even though we cannot decide if we should use it or not.  I say yes since that is most likely what she will be used to, Amy says we should get her a bed.  We will see, for now we have the crib set up and ready.  The dresser is cleaned out and ready to go as well.  We even went out and bought a fan, also installed, and paint samples.  Yes, we know her arrival is a long way away, but we are preparing nonetheless.  

So, what's the next step?  Well, tomorrow Amy will call our agency and "lock" her file.  Then we begin the process of waiting some more for our approval and getting our home study started.  Surreal as it is, it's really happening!  I wish I could share more information about her and pictures, but we are not at the point in the process where we can.  However, as previously blogged, as soon as I can, you know I will be posting!  Until then we continue to ready her room, talk about her, and of course stare, wide-eyed, at the picture of this beautiful little blessing!
 
All is well, moving forward, in Drosche Land. 

The File

What file?  Funny you should ask, that's what this post is all about!  Sit down though, I've got some pretty big news to share.  Are you sitting?  Good, let's go.

Ok, so first of all I would like to begin by stating that God truly does work in some amazing ways.  This fact has been shown to us all too much the past few days.  I'll start back a bit in order to give the entire story.  So, you know that we have decided to take the house off of the market (here).  Well, this wasn't the easiest of decision for Amy and I to make, but one we felt confident in.  As important as the adoption is to us, it had kind of been put on the back burner while we dealt with the new adventure of selling the house.  Who knew God would bring it up to the big front burner in such a big way.  So, the night that we officially decided to stay here, Amy was checking out the list on our agency's website, the awesome Great Wall China Adoption (check it out).  We hadn't done this in quite a while, and honestly I don't know what made her think about it.  However, she did and saw the picture of an adorable little girl.  She called me over and of course I too thought she was beautiful.  Plus, her special need was something we had already discussed and agreed that it was something we could manage.  Coincidence?  So, over the next few days Amy or I would bring her up again, usually with the "Isn't she precious/adorable/cute/beautiful?" statement.  Then we got an email from the agency, their usual newsletter.  However, this one was about children with limb differences, again something we have already identified as totally manageable.  Coincidence?  Ah, but alas, we first filled out our application for the GWCA's Waiting Child list in February of 2010 and it is only good for 6 months, we never resubmitted it because that was when we were beginning to discuss listing the house.  We of course have decided to resubmit since moving the adoption back up to our top priority.  Lastly, when Amy took Braeden to the doctor on Monday the adoption came up in her conversation with the doctor.  Dr. Kinalska, our excellent pediatrician, then happily offered to help us review any files we might receive in the future!  How awesome is that?  Coincidence? 

Which brings me to the grin-inspiring, heart-melting, and awesome events of today.  Amy has, over the past few days, been asking me about whether or not we should call and inquire about the little girl, who we have by now memorized.  Well, what could it hurt I told her this morning.  The worst they could say was no, right?  Well, after a phone call from Amy and an email from me we heard back.  They were emailing us her file!  To review!  Seriously?!?!  Amy came over into my classroom to personally deliver the good news herself.  I can still see the joy in her face when she told me!  So, as I type this we have her file, with so much information about the wonderful little girl, in our possession.  Even greater news, we can proceed forward if we choose to do so!  Seriously?!?!  Amy thoroughly researched the special need on the Internet tonight and we are totally comfortable with it.  Tomorrow Amy will be making an appointment with the fantastic Dr. Kinalska, to have her review the file and give us any information she can.  We also have left a voicemail with another doctor to see if they too will review the file and give us their thoughts.  We plan on making a decision by the end of the week.

Due to privacy reasons and as part of the process I can't give any information on the little girl other than the fact that she is beautiful.  Have I already said that though?  :)  I'm not sure when I will be able to right now, but rest assured as soon as I will you know I'll be blogging and posting pictures like crazy!  Pretty great news huh?  So many things just rapidly fell into place this past week, rocking our world.  It is impossible to deny the fact that God has a plan for us, and it appears as though it is coming to fruition!  I am so excited yet still in shock at it all.  Just this morning everything was the "usual" and we were still in the very beginning of the process.  Suddenly, in less than 12 hours all of that has changed and we have been thrust fully into the adventure!  Seriously?!?!  So, tonight I have a whole new set of thoughts and prayers with which to end my day.  One of our favorite verses, especially throughout this adoption adventure, continues to run through my head.  How true and comforting it is - "For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11


All is well, reviewing reviewing reviewing, in Drosche Land.

Eye Spy!

Well, summer is the time for relaxation and vacations, but it is also the time to squeeze in those appointments and check-ups that there never seems time for during the school year.  Such was the case a little more than a week ago with Braeden.  At his 4-year check-up his doctor, Dr. Kinalska (she is amazing) and one of the nurses, noted that his left eye did not track correctly.  Instead it seemed to go outward slightly.  This is something that Amy and I have noticed occasionally but not quite enough to worry about.  However, after the occurence at the doctor we were encouraged to see a specialist about it, better sooner rather than later despite how small it may seem.  So we made an appointment for the summer, when we would actually have time to go.


So, Monday the 14th we went to see an ophthalmologist.  Yeah, I could have just said eye doctor, but ophthalmologist is so much more fun to say!  Say it - ophthalmologist!  See, told you.  Anyway, he was super nice and Braeden did very well.  However, the doctor was not able to observe the problem himself but made a diagnosis based upon the referral from Braeden's doctor and our stories.  Intermittent Exotropia.  Sound cool huh?  Basically his eye moves outward rather than tracking correctly.  Commonly noticed at this age and not much to worry about.  It could develop further and require treatment or it could not.  We will just have to wait and see.  No worries, we were actually completely unalarmed by it!  So we will just continue to monitor it and make a follow-up appointment in about a year - sooner if it becomes more noticeable.  I have to admit, I thought it would be kind of cool if he got to wear one of those cool pirate patches, but that wasn't necessary right now.  Oh well.  I would have been cool to have a ready-made theme for a Halloween costume! 


Well, why write about Braeden's seemingly miniscule eye problem you might ask?  Well, in addition to the fact that it is just one of our many adventures here in Drosche Land, it got me thinking about the adoption again, the Waiting Child Program in particular.  Not only do Amy and I feel we have been called to adopt a special needs child, I've blogged about that before, but this is an example of how a "special need" does not mean much at all.  Did we choose to have Braeden's vision "problem"?  No.  Does it affect the way we love him?  No.  Had we known he was going to have this "problem" would we have been upset?  No.  Notice I said "problem" rather than problem.  It's all in how you view things (vision pun intended).  This relatively small "problem" is quite likely very similar to the reason that many children are on the Waiting Child list now.  However, does this slight "problem" deem them unloveable?  NO!  Granted, I'm not naive, I am well aware that there are children on the Waiting Child List that have needs far greater than this, but it is a good example of how something small can be termed "special needs" when in fact it just makes them who they are.  We are, after all, fearfully an wonderfully made.  Technically both of the boys are already special needs since they were both born pre-term and have had respiratory problems.  I wouldn't trade them for anything! 

Amy and I have already discussed, at length, the needs we will be capable of handling and caring for and we are very realistic.  This whole issue with Braeden's vision just got me thinking about it all and has really confirmed in my heart that we are not only doing what we have been called to do, but that we are doing the right thing for our family.  It also has further excited me.  But alas, that awful, yet realistic, w-word (wait) has come into play.  I'm ok with that.  Hold on while I step down from my soap box.  Maybe my post got a little preachy but maybe not.  Regardless it is just one of the many adventures we are a part of!

All is well, we can clearly see that, here in Drosche Land.  

Hanging by a Thread

So I think it's time to explain something that I have referenced in past posts and will often reference in future posts.  I'm talking about the red thread reference.  You may or may not be familiar with this, but it means a lot to Amy and I as we begin our adoption adventure so I want to share it.  It is based upon an ancient Chinese legend:

An invisible red thread connects those who are destined to meet, regardless of time, place, or circumstance.  The thread may stretch or tangle, but will never break.

Originally this referred to couples in love, a reference of how people are brought together and united in love.  However, it has come to be a symbol with significant meaning for those couples adopting children from China.  It is clear to see why, especially when looking at it from a Christian point of view.  It was not necessarily in our "plan" for our lives.  Yet it was in His plan for our lives and was revealed to us when the decision to adopt from China and then through the Waiting Child Program was placed upon our hearts.  So you can see how we are already connected to our child although we do not yet know anything about her, other than that she is the next addition to our family and we are her true forever family.  The journey (thread) will be long and will not be free of setbacks or trials (stretching & tangling), yet at the end of the journey (thread) we will find the daughter destined to be ours.  Not only does this legend symbolize everything about this adventure, but it also brings comfort and hope to us as we pursue it.  There is an end and a reward to our journey (thread) no matter what we have to do to achieve it, and it will be well worth everything.

So, now it is explained and in future posts, when mentioned will symbolize so much about this exciting adventure we are embarking on.  Now it is understandable why I included a red thread into Amy's Mother's Day card this year.  Something Amy and I can hold on to and look to as we pursue this next part of our lives together!

All is well, and connected, in Drosche Land.

Not Right Now

So we're taught as children that God answers all prayers.  It might now be the answer you want at that very moment, but it's answered.  We're also taught that God answers prayers with 3 answers: "Yes", "No", and "Not Right Now."  Well, we were given a very good "Not Right Now" example just yesterday.  As much as Amy and I plan things out, we often make major life decisions spur of the moment.  2 great examples are our house and the van.  The adoption process however, is not going to be such an event.  Since submitting our application for the Waiting Child Program we have been perusing the shared lists.  This is a list of all children from China in the Waiting Child Program.  Agencies across the nation have access to this list so there are many children on it.  Well, yesterday morning Amy calls me and tells me to come over to the Children's Center.  I assume that one of the boys has been crazy and I am being called over to help out by disciplining him.  It wouldn't be the first time, and I know it certainly won't be the last.  However, when I arrive, I find Amy looking at the shared list on her computer.  There is a picture of an adorable little girl, about Jack's age.  Her special need is listed as clubfoot and DD.  Through much research and discussion Amy and I have completed our list of special needs that we will be able to care for and clubfoot is on that list.  At the moment we were unsure about what DD might be.  So, I tell Amy to call the lady at the agency and inquire about the little girl, it couldn't hurt right?

Well, long story short, Amy gets in touch with the lady at our agency that is in charge of placements and the list.  DD refers to developmental delay although details of what this might be are sketchy and often completely unknown.  We wouldn't know anything for sure until we requested the little girl's file so we could review it.  However, at this point Amy asks if there is any way around the age limit; remember per Chinese law both parents must be at least 30.  The answer is no, no waivers for this requirement.  So, the process is definitely on hold for the next year and a half until we both turn 30.  However, we are not saddened or disappointed.  In fact, we feel quite the opposite.  It is God's answer for us, telling us that it is not in our plans, at least "not right now."  Instead, it seems to support our original plan of paying off all of the credit cards and car before the adoption process officially begins.  A perfect answer for us.  We will have the time to research, pray, and mentally, emotionally, and financially prepare.  That is just fine with us.  We are quite at peace with everything.  Obviously we would have to be either way since there is no way around this requirement, but it does help to be truly alright with the answer we are given.  It WILL happen, we WILL get our daughter.  Just "not right now."

All is well, with answered prayers, in Drosche Land. 

Coverage!

Victory!  Woo hoo!  No more worries (for a while at least)!  Amy called our insurance this morning regarding the worries I wrote about last night (see Insurance Worries).  Good news!  There is no such thing as "pre-existing conditions" when it comes to adoption, this includes international adoption!  As long as we file the paperwork to add our child to our insurance within 30 days of finalizing the adoption we are good and the child is covered!  Ahhhh, I can breath a sigh of relief and sleep well tonight thanks to the efforts of my wonderful wife!  So, one less worry to have to face as we proceed with the adoption process.  It is good to know that no matter what special need our child will have, they will be covered and we will be able to provide proper medical care no matter what is needed.  Definitely a prayer answered here!  I love good news!
 
Overall a good day too, outside of the good news just mentioned.  One cute story came about.  Students from the UT Dental School came and visited classrooms to talk about brushing and good dental hygiene.  Braeden was very excited about it.  Brushing used to be a huge drama for us but has gotten better.  Truth be told though, even though I feel like a horrible parent for it, I totally forgot to have the boys brush tonight.  It was  a late night and we rushed into bed.  However, about 45 minutes later I hear Braeden calling over the monitor.  I go in to check on him and he says, "I forgot to brush my teeth Daddy.  The dentist said you have to brush your teeth before you go to bed."  HA!  I cracked up!  So, I let them get out of bed to brush their teeth, using their new brushes and toothpaste they received at school.  It was so cute, but at least he was obviously listening.  Next step is to take them to the dentist!  Ugh!  I know they should probably have already gone and I feel horrible for not having taken them yet, but it is just major drama we have not had the courage to face.  I foresee much weeping and gnashing of teeth.  Not to mention the fact that Braeden has a super sensitive gag reflex so who knows the problems that will bring about!  We have a great dentist (plug for Dr. Daniel Bellinger!) but have just not taken the plunge yet.  This summer might be a good time for that, we will see.  I can't even begin to think of that just yet!  Well, time to sign off, another good day!
 
All is well, and covered, in Drosche Land.

Insurance Worries

So, now that Amy and I have decided that adoption through the China Waiting Child Program is right for us, we are presented with a new set of questions/worries.  Insurance.  Will insurance cover any medical needs our child has?  Will they deem any special needs as "pre-existing"?  What insurance hurdles, if any, do we face as we proceed?  Amy tried to call this evening but was given the answer of calling our insurance company directly.  Well, of course Murphy's Law would have it that we found this out after the close of the business day.  So we must wait until tomorrow.  That is, if we can even be given a direct answer tomorrow when Amy calls.  Of course I am a bundle of worries!  If insurance does not cover costs of future medical needs, that throws a serious wrench into our plans as obviously we would not be able to financially support many things.  So, I worry.  Amy says not to, it's senseless to worry about something we know nothing about.  But, I worry.  What if?  What if?  What if?  Will this become my new mantra throughout this adoption process?  I fear the answer is a resounding yes!  But I take a deep breath and proceed with prayer as Amy calls insurance again tomorrow!  I hope she receives a positive answer right away without further drama.  We shall see though.  Did I mention that until then I worry?  I worry. I'm generally a positive, rosy-colored glasses, glass half-full person.  But this process brings out the anxious worrier in me.  I want it so badly, the possibility that something could impede it scares me.  So, I worry.  Useless I know, but I do.  Hopefully tomorrow will bring a post alleviating all of the fears and worries expressed in this one.  

Other than that though, today was quite a good day!  It seems as though last week, and the drama it brought, are slowly slipping behind us!  It was a late night for us, but the day is drawing to a quiet and peaceful ending.  So, I end this post as I began: worrying.  Happy, but worrying.  Off to bed to think and pray more about the phone call Amy will make tomorrow.  

All is well, though worried, in Drosche Land.   

Confirmation

Well, we just finished our Waiting Child webinar.  I was excited about it all day long, it was all I could think about.  Finally we would be actively doing something toward our adoption plan.  Amy and I have done quite a bit of research on our own so there wasn't a lot of terribly new information provided to us, but there was some stuff we had not yet thought about.  Plus we will be receiving a lot of information in the coming days that will correspond to the Waiting Child program.  The best thing to come from it was the definite feeling placed upon both of our hearts that this is indeed what God has planned for us.  When it was over, Amy and I pretty much looked at each other and nodded - yes!

Amy is actually filling out the application online as I write this.  I'm not sure exactly what the next steps to follow will be since neither of us are 30 yet, the age China requires all adoptive parents to be.  But it is for sure the next step for us in pursuing this blessed addition to our family.  The main thing that we will need to do is to decide what special needs we are open to including in our application.  After that???  

Ok, so I paused from writing this to help Amy fill out our application!  It is fully submitted and we should be hearing more in a few days from someone from Great Wall China Adoption, the agency we have chosen to work with.  We will see what then lies ahead once we know more.  We know there is still a long road ahead of us, but it will be easy to travel together now knowing that this is right for us.  

All is well, and confirmed now, here in Drosche Land!

The Waiting Game

Well, we haven't even officially begun the adoption process and already it is a rollercoaster.  Clearly the term "waiting" will become a frequent part of our vocabulary.  Waiting for us right now has so many differeny meanings.

Waiting 1 - We are waiting until the end of this year/early next year to even apply to adopt since we will not both be 30 until Amy's birthday in August 2011.  Until then we just read, research, and pray about it.  Not much else to do.

Waiting 2 - The latest meaning this word has for us it via The Waiting Child program.  As we read more and more about the adoption process from China, it is clear that the wait is long, very long.  As mentioned before the current wait time is about 40 months.  But that is as of now, not in 18 months when we are able to submit our paperwork.  By then who know?  The Waiting Child program is a slightly different method of adoption.  The children in this program are either (a) older, above 5 or (b) special needs.  The definition of special needs is broad and covers things one could deem as "simple" such as vision problems, to more severe needs.  Amy and I have of course looked into this and prayed and discussed at length.  It is something we are open to.  There are "special needs" we could handle both monetarily and emotionally.  We are currently signed up for a Waiting Child Webinar on Tuesday night that will give us more insight and information into this program.  This will help us to better understand the program and make an informed decision.  We are both very excited about it as it is the first active thing we will get to participate in regarding adoption.  

Waiting 3 - Once we apply we will begin to wait as we assemble our dossier, complete our home study, and of course wait for Amy's 30th birthday.

Waiting 4 - Once we submit all of our paperwork we wait for approval to adopt before we can do anything else.

Waiting 5 - Once we receive approval we will be able to view and select a child (assuming we go with The Waiting Child program, which we are leaning toward due to the shortened "wait time" to adopt).  When we find our child, we wait again to receive approval for the child.

Waiting 6 - Once we receive approval we get to wait for our travel dates to China.

That's a lot of waiting.  I am sure there is a lot more I am leaving out, I am still a novice at the whole concept of China adoption.  I am sure as we get further into the process there will come new definitions for waiting.  Time will tell.

Why, do you ask, am I writing about this?  Good question.  Therapy I guess is one answer, an outlet for the emotions that come with this.  If this is how I am before we have officially begun, can you imagine what I will be like when we are fully into it?  :)  Also, Amy and I have been reading more, as has become the norm once the boys go to bed.  There is a lot of negative news out there about wait times and the China adoption process as a whole.  What if it doesn't happen?  What if China is not the right choice for us?  What if, what if, what if?  The questions and doubts swirled.  I got a little (Amy would say a lot) down on everything, so off to the blog I went.  To whine, vent, ramble, etc.  Regardless, it has actually helped.  Does anyone read this?  Who knows, I installed a counter to find out! :)  But readers or not, I am enjoying this new addiction of blogging.  Keeping family and friends updated about our family and this new adventure we are entering, and just talking; both are very theraputic and fun.

But I digress.  I guess it's time to stop this rambling, at times nonsensical post.  But I end it in a better mood than when I began, even if slightly.  All is well, as we wait, in Drosche Land.